Manners please.

HELLO, my name's Stuart, and for the last eight years I've worked in tourism. Sometimes it's been voluntary, sometimes it's been to ensure that I fulfil my graduation promise to myself that I'd never set foot in Centrelink ever again.

During that time I've worked for three different tour companies, two backpacker hostels, a five-star London hotel and now at a couple of serviced apartment complexes. Throughout I've always tried to get a laugh or smile out of a guest to try and brighten up their day, add a bit of personality etc etc, a massive spray recently from a couple of people who didn't seem to think extra charges applied to them left me pretty shaken up and disillusioned.

As such, in the interests of tourism workers everywhere I'd like to share a few points with y'all about how get the most out of your tourism experience.

Do your research
Seriously. So many people are quick to jump onto Tripadvisor (more about that later) and complain about facilities (or lack thereof), extra parking charges, credit card authorisations etc. This is actually where Tripadvisor can come into its own: while there's nearly always one person per page that thinks your establishment is where Beezlebub himself controls his evil empire of reality shows, what you'll generally find are helpful comments about facilities (or lack thereof), extra parking charges, credit card authorisations etc. And if you don't trust Tripadvisor, every booking website I've come across has a reviews section from people who've actually paid and stayed. This would have saved one couple, who when told they had to leave a credit card pre-authorisation decided to punch the manager in the head.
Then, failing all that, just read the fucking terms and conditions when you make a booking. Trust me, everything you need to know is generally there.

Listen to staff
One place I worked at had a slightly convoluted way to get to the carpark, ie there were more than three steps to it. So what we'd do on check-in was hand them a piece of paper with the instructions, then go through each step individually, stressing certain aspects about where they could and couldn't park. Now while this was plenty for most people one lady in particular sticks in my mind. She came to check in, I went through each step with her, stressing one lift was for residents and the other for our guests. Ten minutes later she stormed across from the residential lifts, complaining that I hadn't properly explained where she had to go. A couple of days later she called to complain about something else, then claimed I'd left her waiting for over an hour before I'd checked her in. She also reckoned that while I'd given her the instruction paper, I didn't explain that she had to read it.
Now in this situation you're doing all you can to not call her an idiot and hang up the phone. She complained to the manager, although his comment afterwards was along the lines of "I feel stupider for having spoken to her", so I wasn't in any trouble there. Likewise the girl who had a bag stolen in Barcelona on one tour. I'd spent about 10 minutes explaining that Barcelona was notorious for pickpockets and thieves, that you only had to lose sight of your bag for a second, and that on average one person on every coach had their stuff nicked. Soon enough she came up to me in tears saying her bag had been stolen but she'd "only turned around for a second". This was part of a horror stretch where four punters had bags stolen in Florence, Nice and Barcelona; two of them later came up and said they wished they'd heeded my warnings a little better.

Staff are people too
On a ferry over to Fraser Island I overheard two people discuss how rude/abrupt the ferry captain was to them. One of them commented that maybe that's just how he was; the other said that people like that shouldn't be in tourism and that you should be happy all the time.
They're right - but only so far as your default setting should be approachable/friendly. But sometimes you've had a rubbish night's sleep, sometimes you're going through relationship issues, sometimes you've just received a massive spray for saying parking was $25. The last couple of people who've decided to share their anger issues with me have all had people standing right behind them - stepping out back to have a cry/punch holes in walls isn't an option. It takes a fucking lot to be happy and bubbly after someone's tried to tear you a new one because they didn't want to pay for parking.
That's not to say you can't fairly criticise. The worst tour I ever took had some ridiculous feedback (one review had me as the worst tour guide, but I knew my stuff, was well organised and brought the group together), but also some fair stuff like how I was being "smug" when answering questions. I took it on board and the very next tour was one of my very best - wouldn't have happened had I not received that criticism.

Things go wrong. Control yourself
One of the best sprays I've ever witnessed was a German businessman in London abusing the night manager because his swipe key didn't work. Never mind that he was blind drunk and probably doing it wrong: we were the worst fucking place in the world and the worst fucking staff and etc etc etc. Next day he received a note under his door from the hotel manager politely informing him he would no longer be welcome to stay with us.
Ever hear the phrase "you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar"? It's true - especially when you want something fixed. Looking back on a couple of sprays people have given me I know for a fact I could have handled it better, but for whatever reason didn't. Part of that reason is that when someone is yelling at you, cutting you off and saying "YOU stuffed up our check-in and YOU didn't do this and YOU didn't do that", you don't really want to help them, you want to tell them to fuck off. Your blood pressure rises, you want to shout back, but you can't because you're a professional.
There's another saying: "do unto others as you would have others do unto you". Do you like being shouted at at work by people you've never met before?
Didn't think so.

Problem? See staff straight away
Once upon a time a Scottish woman checked into a hostel I ran. This lady had a persona that screamed "I hate people" - I never once saw her socialise, never once saw her smile. But every time she walked past I'd make sure I addressed her by name, asked how she was and offer advice where needed. When she checked out I felt I'd put in the hard yards to make her stay memorable.
That was until she submitted her review. Turned out the hostel was just awful, service was bad and that there were so many things wrong with it that she wouldn't recommend us to her worst enemy etc. This annoyed me - not because those issues didn't need fixing, but because in all the time I'd been saying hello how are you she never once mentioned these.
Likewise a review I saw on Tripadvisor for a place I'm staying at in January. Just about every review is 4 or 5 stars (hence why I've booked it), except for one. Once again there was one person who ripped the place to shreds, saying the room was rubbish and that they had to ask for fresh towels. What I love about this review is that the owners responded back, asking why if these guests were having such a terrible time did they not mention anything when, you know, sitting by the fireplace chatting with the owners.
 If something's wrong with your accommodation, I want to fix it. When you're on my tour bus/in my ho(s)tel, I want you to enjoy your experience and rave about us to your friends. Making you happy makes me happy. Telling me on check-out the lights didn't work, but that you didn't want to call reception because it was late so you showered in the dark is really quite stupid. Tell us and we don't fix it, then by all means slag us off online. Tell us after the event and I'm afraid there's not much we can do.


So that's just a few tips. I'm sure there's many more; I'm sure there are some that would consider that just a rant from someone better suited to an office job. And that's fine: just be polite about it, ok? Remember, everyone wants you to have a good time.